Thursday, March 19, 2015

My Beast is A Badass

A teacher friend of mine shared a quote that has helped me find my inspiration this week...

It's true. Life is hard, and you need to push yourself a little. For most, there is no coasting through. There is especially no coasting if you genuinely want to accomplish anything. This has been an adventure so far, and hopefully will continue to be - and it certainly has been difficult at times.

Growing up, my mother had this magnet on the fridge, that was in the shape of a pig and stated "I ate my will power." Back then, I probably did not fully comprehend this joke, because I didn't find it funny or fridge worthy. However, just the other day I was crackin' will power jokes and remembered this not-so-worthy magnet. Suddenly, I understood the humour. I have absolutely no will power. It is quite possible that I did indeed eat it during one of my binges.

I have no idea how someone can have so much ambition and work ethic in certain areas and be lacking so much in will power when it comes to eating right and working out. But that is me, in a nut shell. If it is in the house, I am going to eat it - probably ALL of it. Make myself work out? Ha! I think I am missing a will power gene. I think I replaced the will power gene with an excuse fabrication gene.

So let's see...lack of will power, amazing ability to develop excuses...I can pretty much envision how I got here. But, I think I see changes on the horizon!

Me: I have this little headache I can't get rid of.
Her: Huh, wonder why.
Me: Probably from coughing all day long.
Her: Probably.
Me: Weird I just have this cough I can't get rid of.
Her: It has been a few weeks.
Me: I know....
Her: Ebola, maybe? Are your eyeballs bleeding?
Me: Not that I recall...I'm seeing pretty clearly.

This is what I deal with! On a serious note, I have had this great excuse for a couple of weeks, now. No...not Ebola - I have a cough. Yes, a cough. Normally, I'd tell myself, "You should really rest"..."You must be fighting something off"..."You don't want it to get worse." While this is all somewhat true, normally I would take that to mean I need to lay in bed for days and binge watch Netflix. I tend to take things to the extreme, remember?...But, not this time!

Do any of these statements sound familiar? "I will never get up early and work out, so I'm not going to claim to do that"..."I'm going to be honest and realistic so these changes can be long term." Probably - because I think I've mentioned them every blog! I know you're all nodding like the SNL Roxbury skit. Again, there is truth to these statements but that does not mean I need to be so extreme about it.

I'm all about keeping it real - know your strengths, know your weaknesses - work with them. For instance, I accept that it is likely I will never have a thigh gap. I have a better chance of my legs molding together and transforming into a mermaid tale. I'm just keepin' it real! I THOUGHT I was keeping it real when I claimed I could not do morning work outs. However, I have some new advice: Try anything once. Because I have seen the light!

It only took that one morning for me to fall in love with my morning work out. Now, each morning I am rearing and ready to go...and when it's not fit to go, I'm totally ticked off! I know it would not be very wise for me to head out while the snow plows are running - ending ass over tea kettle in a snow bank will not help my cause. When Tuesday morning rolled around - I'm so excited and ready for it, I was tossing and turning in my bed, watching the clock. The alarm finally goes off at 5:45am, I roll out of bed, pull on my clothes, lace up my sneakers and I'm off. Just me and the road.

I can't even look at weather reports at this point..not because I'm sick of snow, or worried about snow, but because I will be terribly irritated if I think I can't hit the road in the morning. When I'm out there, when I'm going - I'm a different person. I'm confident. I'm able. I push myself. I don't give up or give in. I run until I feel like I can't breath, then I walk until I can, run until I can't breath, walk until I can...and you get the picture. I don't feel like I'm on display. Each day I go a little further and a little further. I don't let anything stop me - I think this is what they refer to as "beast mode".

Back when I was a Pinterester - and not a doer (now I'm both) I would read t-shirts, ads, slogans, quotes, etc. referring to "beast mode". Quite frankly, I hated the term. I certainly did not want to think of myself as a beast while I was working out. Since I'm 5'8, pretty round with a giant head, I already feel like an ogre 90% of the time - I certainly did not want to refer to myself as a beast.

However, I have embraced the term!...and my beast is a badass! It only took me that one morning to get hooked. Not only did I find my beast, but I actually LIKE my beast...oh, and did I mention she's a badass? And this badass beast lost 3.2lbs this week and finally crossed the 20lb. loss finish line!

With 162 days left to go, I have embraced my inner beast. So, even if you're POSITIVE you will not like it (as I was) just try it once to be sure. You may be surprised - you may even find your inner beast.

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